6 style tips for the modern day African feminist

For some reason, when someone is called a feminist there is a stereotypical look that characterizes the mental image. In the early 50s the idea of wearing trousers was enough to earn you that status. Now in 2016 after intensive research (mostly on twitter), I have compiled a list of beauty and style tips for the modern feminists.

It should be noted that based on my research if you don’t strictly comply with this list you have no right to call yourself a feminist and should not be taken seriously as one.

  1. Natural hair, usually dripping with coconut oil. If you don’t have natural hair you must now proceed to do the big chop. Having relaxed hair is a constant remembrance of colonialism and western oppression.
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  2. If you are an African feminist without white parents, you are not allowed to be light skinned (because you’ve probably bleached). Your melanin must always be popping. If you happen to be this brand of light skin, you are not allowed to call yourself a feminist.
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  3. If you want a break from donning your own natural hair, the only other hairstyle you are allowed to do is braid in any manner or form. Forget weaves and wigs, they are a symbol of oppressive western influence
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  4. You have to own a lot of Ankara, or any other home-grown fabric. 99% of your closet should consist of clothes made with our very own local fabrics.
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  5. The only makeup you are allowed to have on is lip-gloss (and only during harmattan). How dare you fill in your brows? Makeup is a social construct, men don’t wear makeup so why do you need to wear makeup?
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  6. Don’t shave any parts of your body; legs, armpits or down below. What is the need for this grooming? These are standards that have been imposed on us by our overly patriarchal society.
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That’s all for now. Hope you took notes.

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