Contrary to popular belief, not all men have crew cuts. Some men for personal or religious reasons choose to grow out their hair, either as a huge afro, relaxed hair or dreadlocks.
Once your hair starts to pass that seven inch threshold, a whole different set of problems emerge. If you have long hair you probably have gone through this.
HAVING TO DEFEND YOUR LONG HAIR EVERYTIME YOU GO OUT
Nigerians cannot mind their business, nah, they’re too busy minding yours. Old people will walk up to you and chastise you, young people will make snide remarks, its tough for a guy with long hair out there.
PEOPLE ASSUMING THAT JUST BECAUSE YOU HAVE LOCKS YOU ARE A RASTAFARIAN/AFROBEAT SINGER/FOOTBALLER/SMOKE WEED
If I slap you now, they will say I am wicked.
HAVING TO WASH/RELAX/LOCK YOUR HAIR YOURSELF BECAUSE YOURE TIRED OF ANSWERING QUESTIONS WHEN YOU GO TO A SALON TO DO IT.
Cries in the matriarchy.
HAVING TO PAY THROUGH YOUR NOSE EVERYTIME YOU DO GO TO THE SALON
FINDING HAIR STYLES THAT ARE WORK APPROPRIATE
Might as well solve Nigeria’s electricity wahala while you’re at it.
MISTAKENLY BLINDING PEOPLE EVERYTIME YOU TURN YOUR HEAD
Dont hate me cos I’m biuriful.
HAIR PRODUCTS ALWAYS STAINING YOUR CLOTHES
Good bye shirt, I will always love you.
GOING BANKRUPT EVERYTIME YOU BUY HAIR PRODUCTS
Cries in poverty.
PEOPLE ALWAYS WANTING TO TOUCH YOUR HAIR
Get yourself a barbie and leave me the hell alone.
But for hair like this, it is all worth it in the end.
Photocredit: Instagram/bennyharlem